Ten on Tuesday...actually on Tuesday!

1. Me: Madie, is it tuesday?
Madie: What, wednesday?
Me: No, I think it's tuesday.

Now, I know what it's like to lose your mind. Like I didn't before. Now I know in a different way. There ya go.

2. Got Madie " Wherever you are, my love will find you". Nancy Tillman books are $5 at kohls. Bargain on awesome books!

3. Last week at work was very trying. Fro got the whole story, but basically my boss is a tool. Job Search 2011 commence! She basically told me, me being depressed was going to push her over the edge. My friend Liz put it best when she said, "since when is perkiness a job requirement? you don't work at the gap!". I also found something on facebook this week which seemed appropriate, "i am who i am, your approval isn't needed".

4. Tonight in kohls, madie and I walked through the bra/underwear to get somewhere else, and she laughed hysterically through the entire department which made me laugh hysterically. All together good fun.

5. Going to dinner with the girls i graduated nursing school with tomorrow night. That should be fun.

6. I skipped yoga tonight, but I went last week, and I thoroughly enjoy it. I find it very relaxing and spiritual and not at all like exercise.

7. I"m reading "the story of beautiful girl". i just started it, and it's already very good.

8. Brandon's brother and his girlfriend and their kids came up last friday. We went to dinner with his mother minus brandon, because he had to work, which was okay. His mom isn't my favorite, but it went fine. Then Anthony (bro) and fam stayed the night. The kids had fun, and Brandon got to see his bro when he got off work. That worked out well. His bro is okay.

9. I told madie in the car earlier tonight her dad would flip is lid if she had a boyfriend, and she just repeated me verbatim. It's funny when a 4 year old says "flip his lid". Coincidentally, it's also funny when my gramma bales says it. She said it about my aunt sharon once.

10. Gramma Lehman doing better. She's in rehab at mercy trying to get stronger.

Bonus #11. I LOVE the cold front! It finally feels like fall! My favorite! too many explanation points? Probably, but I am really pumped!

update

Gramma Lehman is doing better. They moved her to the rehab unit at mercy.

We went to Brandon's dads house yesterday. I don't think we've seen him in forever, a year for real maybe last thanksgiving! His dad is the only family member of his i truly like. He's always been nice to me. He lives in Hammond though, which is like 2 hours away in western oklahoma. It was a good day, except I got too hot and got sick on the way home. boo. We had to pull over twice so I could puke. not pleasant, but otherwise a good visit.

Today, I woke up late, ran by target and checked in on Gramma and Grampa Bales. They are okay. Grampa continues to decline with the parkinsons. It is hard for him to get words out, and he gets frustrated. He also has dementia with lewy bodies. He sees things. He says mostly little kids. It used to scare him, but now he just tells them to get out of his way. It's hard to see your grampa go from superman to human.

Tomorrow, it's back to the grind. Wouldn't it be great to be independently wealthy and just be able to volunteer for charity? Ah, the dream!

Memorial Wall for Reserve Deputy Tim Lowry-PoliceMemorialWall.com

Memorial Wall for Reserve Deputy Tim Lowry-PoliceMemorialWall.com

October is my favorite month, but oct 1 this year was a real bummer. We had a family friend from down at the farm die in a tragic car accident. http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/note.php?note_id=10150402698820407 Tim Lowry was a sheriffs deputy for Pottawatomie county. He was on his way back from issuing warrants with his partner when they topped a hill and a semi was making an illegal turn. They collided, and that was it.

Gramma continues to have episodes where she cannot get her words out. The tests come back normal. They are unsure if it's tia's, seizures, or medication side effects......they are guessing and doing their best at treating. So far, the guessing game isn't going great. I do think the dr she has is a good dr, and is really trying. It's just a tough situation.

Sorry for the debbie downer. Just wanted to keep you updated.

Grandparents

My grandparents are the most amazing people in the world. My parents had a period of criminal insanity. If it weren't for my grandparents, I would be more insane than I am. They are the first people who loved me unconditionally. I didn't get that from my parents. My parents aren't bad people, but there was a time when it didn't go well between us, and my grandparents loved me. I spent summers with them as a child, and there was nowhere I would rather be. My parents went on vacation one time and gave me a choice to stay with g&g or go with them, and I stayed with g&g. They are my safe place, and they live in the hood. I do visualization of my room at gramma lehman's when I'm anxious, to relax. It has been very hard to lose Grampa Lehman and watch Grampa Bales decline. Grampa Bales has parkinsons that is really affecting his mind. I'm obviously his favorite, and he forgot my name one day when I went to visit him. That was pretty tough. Gramma Lehman has been in descent health until hit by a truck. It is just scary and hard to grow up and lose the people that have always loved me.

Gramma Lehman

Last week,92 year old Gramma was at sams preparing for a family party (that actually got cancelled because of the course of events). She took her buggy and was heading to the car when she was hit by a truck. We don't know if she walked out in front of it or if he wasn't paying attention. She went to the ER by ambulance, and we were called. She had some bleeding on the brain which they watched for 24 hours. It leveled off, and they released her. Aunt Rita stayed the night with her for several nights. 2 nights ago Uncle Donnie went to check on her. She seemed fine. Then, she was paying bills and said something's wrong. Her hand felt numb. Then she couldn't get words out. She went to the hospital by ambulance again, and there was new bleeding on the brain. This morning, she has her speech back, and we are waiting excessively long for someone to read an mri to see if she had as tia or cva (mini-stroke or stroke). They are taking so dang long, because it won't change the course of treatment. They can't put her on blood thinners to prevent strokes, because it could increase the bleeding on the brain. They moved her from ICU to intermediate care today. We are watching and waiting...
Prayers appreciated.

Incontinence!

well, mom has been having a lot of health issues with fatigue and leg cramps. Her old doctor seemed to be inadequate, so she tried a new chick. This lady seems to be on spot. Mom had been giving herself b12 injections with a small needle, only making it in the fat. The old doctor was apparently a tard. The new doctor gave her 1.5 inch needles, and mom couldn't psych herself up enough to give it. So, today I ran by on my lunch break to give her this injection. She was so freaked out and anxious, she was slightly hysterical, like that hysterical laughter type of hysterical. It rubbed off on me, and by the time I was trying to give her the shot, I had to cross my legs and concentrate. My attempt at not peeing my pants failed miserably, as did moms. We totally both peed our pants laughing! It WAS hysterical! Oh my gosh. My aunt Sharon was there to witness but somehow had control of her bladder. We went for a quick lunch at el chicos, and then I ran home to change clothes before my next visit. On a side note, where do i get me some of those quick drying pants???